The last few blog posts have been about momming… which is all fine and dandy except for the fact that this blog is not a mom blog and I don’t actually know a whole lot about the concept of momming beyond keeping my daughter breathing, telling her about Jesus, and praying for the best… so I felt it was time to insert a leetle bit of business up in hurr.
If you don’t know the “up in hurr” reference, just consider yourself a better Christian than I and forget I ever mentioned it.
Anyways, God has put some big goals on my heart and even bigger dreams in my vision, and I’m as eager to chase after them as my 110 pound Great Dane is to eat each morning. I’m eager, yet cautious, because I’ve been there done that sort of thing before and I want desperately to stay the course and not lose myself in the boundless perimeter of my own ego.
Here’s me and my ego:
Along with building a ministry with my two best friends (if you haven’t heard of Awaken, girl, we need to talk!), I feel led to get my Christian Life Coaching certificate later this year with the intention of starting an online business in 2019 helping Jesus girls develop their brands, and their messages, with Jesus at the center. That’s a big undertaking. And because I know the risks that come from chasing “success”, I could almost talk myself out of it if I wasn’t so sure it’s exactly why God allowed me to grow a self-glorifying business in the first place, back in 2014.
Tis true He never wastes a moment, or a mess, and I believe He led me through the lessons to lead me to the next level of obedience.
Finding Jesus, for me, was a lot like building the online business that finding Him would eventually lead me away from. I had such a desire for the business and all the sparkly promises that shimmered in the distance, because I had a stronger desire to not remain the same person I was the day that I signed up. I sought Jesus with a vengeance because my life was no longer offering me “salvation,” in much the same way that I worked so hard on that business because I was in need of a lifeline… something to remind me that I was there, I existed, I mattered.
I wanted to be more than my past and greater than my fears. And before I found the redemptive healing that comes from knowing and following Christ, I found Beachbody. But listen, being a good business person does not make you a good person. And business success does not mean life success. I succeeded in business because I didn’t need anyone to hold my hand and make me do what needed to be done to “change”; I was unwilling to go back to what I’d come to know as normal.
However, after three years of striving and chasing, pursuing and struggling to not only attain but maintain, when the glitter settled and the shine wore off, I realized I was the same me I had been… I just had a new set of insecurities and people to impress. I came to the sobering realization that I couldn’t outrun myself. I could disguise myself behind titles and rank, I could talk the talk, fake it until I made it, and hide behind a computer screen and strategic angles on photos captioned by my gift for impactful wording… but it was still me.
I may have stopped trying to be validated by people outside of the business, but I still sought recognition, validation, and approval by a team and a company. I hadn’t changed, I’d only changed who I tried to impress.
What does all of that have to do with my future endeavors? Everything. I am not an anti-online business advocate. I still believe in chasing dreams (that God gives you), I still believe in entrepreneurial pursuits (that align with God’s purpose for your life), and I still believe that creative ventures over the internet are the future (if they are used to glorify God’s name). I didn’t leave the last business because the business was bad. I left it because I tried to use it to fill the void that could only be filled by God Himself…and once the void was filled, the business no longer served me.
But this next business? This next one will be about serving others, helping women find their Christian voices in whatever they aspire to do, encouraging ladies of faith to follow the path that keeps them closest to Jesus.
The fact is, I love the branding process. I love the brainstorming, the masterminding, the colors, the words, and the development process. I love the creative side of business and I love the Jesus side of life. So, while I’m happily, excitedly, and passionately pursuing these great adventures, this year, I’m also maintaining my focus. Because I happen to know first hand that a business without the guidance of the Holy Spirit is just an idol which, as Cher Horowitz so eloquently put it, “is a full on Monet. From far away it’s okay but up close it’s a big old mess.”
Cher wasn’t actually describing anything business related. But I think we can all learn a thing or two from her revelations in the 90’s classic, Clueless. And if you don’t get this reference, consider yourself deprived and go watch the movie. (Yes, I did just plug a romcom that includes topics such as high school partying and doobie smoking on a Christian blog. It’s not a life guide, people, but it is funny.)
How’s that for an “anything but momming” post? What are your big dreams for 2018?
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